today is a big big big bigger biggest day for me n my gf...today is our together 200day le...but today i din go out wif gf...i choose to go out wif fren those working in da kiong...i noe this is a very hurt thing for gf...but i did it....this time i think i hurt her much...i choose go out wif fren but not her...for gal...they will feel she no improtant in my heart...not only gf...other couple oso will feel is my wrong...fren more important than her...so...i wrong...i noe i do wrong thing again...

anyway...wrong mean wrong...cant save anymore...n now my gf dun wan hiu me too le...i dunno wat to do...nan dao our gan qing will end here???i oso dunno...if end she will sad...if no end she more sad...i oso dunno how....i keep take going study for the reason...i oso dunno myself wan wat...i really dunno wat am i doing now...blur n confuse...outside still many pretty n beauty gal???should i think like tat???pretty for wat???pretty can eat can sell money???i dunno...my gf oled good enough...wat am i wan for other???i dunno...confuse...o other reason???many ppl tell me study first...maybe will find more good de gal when u sutdy...i dunno...

i only noe if me going out study maybe i will change heart o less feel to my gf if we really few meet...but this is all the damn reason...this main reason is me still flower...me only take this for reason only...i cant ang ding xia lai...dunno wat is me looking for....haih...i really fell my life just like nothing...wanna end my life...on this world only make ppl sad nia...better gu dan on person till die...no love no like no gal in my life...just end it like tat...

i really nid to say sori to the gal those hury by me before n now....i really hurt many gal...hand cant count finish the gal i hurting...really many many...maybe just like my teacher say...the boy age below 25 o 30 still child...still will looking for the flower n grass outside the world...ouside the world really hav many thing we no c before...so when we c it maybe we will tarik by them o something special...maybe i still like tat...maybe...really dunno...

maybe my gf will dun wan me when she c this post...but i really do wrong thing...so if she really dun wan me then i wish her can really meet a real good man for her...wish jesus bless always around her...i can go hell get my punishment...sori gal...